originally posted 7/5/10
Love motivates people to do the most insane things, productive things, tedious things, heroic things and what may from a distance look like overzealous things. I remind my oldest when he asked why oh why we don’t eat like other people most night and I insist on ethnic foods filled with vegetables and spices. I tell him how easy it would be to just feed him mac and cheese/hot dogs or carry out and be done with it. He also questions why or why he has to do swim team when he really does not enjoy swimming anymore and I tell him that it would be so easy to allow him to sit and grow heavy and have athro and arterial sclerosis and that agressesing him to take care of his body now gives him the best chance at being healthy later. He likely does not understand but maybe some he will and maybe someday he will tell friends how evil mom was forcing him to swim and eat ethnic vegetables. My daughter told me once she feels like she is caged because I would not let her wander the halls during scout meetings. I tried to impress upon her that few good choices would not likely be made (like running into the boys room or being in the upstairs of a school that is closed).
With Bird the love is not more than for Herd or Peep but the level of commitment to that love is far greater (for now). Rarely a conversation that is misspoke can go by with out a query about c0rrect language or intent. Not often am I able to simply allow Bird to enjoy free time at the pool or park without watching closely to give feedback later about what I saw, heard or believed needed to be worked on. Many times Bird is confused about things that others take for granted but not to explain those things would be a far less loving thing to do though some days I feel he just wants to scream when he is for the 100th time that day listening to more information about something others don’t have to hear about.
Love means vigilance. It really is that simple. Vigilance means better kids and that means happier parents.