I knew from a very early age that Bird was not a typical child. He has a twin and a brother who is only 13 months older than the twins so if you lined them up and played the song from Sesame Street Which One is Not Like the Others you could plainly see it was him! If you look at my post Bird at 6 weeks if gives great detail to this affect.
At 2 Bird would not make eye contact with anyone, did not enjoy being held, carried something everywhere he went, spoke not a single word ….we could not even pretend that it sounded like something as many parents do because it did not!
On the advice of our Pediatrician after much prodding from me he agreed that perhaps Bird should see a speech pathologist because of his lack of language at Age 2.
We went to see an AMAZING women named Phyllis Behr! JACK POT! Neither of my twins were speaking at 2 but Peep obviously did not have autism as she was very clear about her wants and needs! If she wanted it you would be getting it or there would be hell to pay…she is much like this today. My oldest was incredibly chatty at 9 month and had likely 25 or more words at 1 year. Herd (my oldest) stopped speaking when the twins came home. He was depressed and angry. His life had been 1st class flights around the world and Shakespeare Theater box seats with Jaleo after wards. He was so heart broken about these interlopers it really affected all aspects of his personality but still not autism. Herd starting speaking again a few months later and was the most social creature ever these days he is much more of an intellect but still very loving with his Dad and I.
Back to Bird and Phyllis Behr the One Women Force! So neither of my twins at now 2.5 years old were excited about going to see this stranger all the way out in South Riding a 50 minute drive most days each way. Each had mini tantrums at the door or at the table and it was embarrassing.
Peep started gaining skills quickly though and stopped throwing tantrums. Phyllis about 3 weeks into our bi-weekly sessions (insurance paid $30 of the $100 visits…there went the 1st class tickets and Shakespeare theater) mentioned she would be taking a class in New York with a man named Carbone learning something called ABA/VB. This truly meant as much to me at the time as mentioning that you needed to pick up some baking soda at the store…who were you seeing in NY?
Bird continued his horrible tear at Phyllis door and screaming at the table 5 weeks into seeing her. Most people likely would have thought after driving kid 10 times to South Riding that enough is enough but I stuck to it unlike diets of the past.
She told me at the end of a session that is was not a behavioral issue. She told me she would call me that night and we could talk about what might be going on. She was SMART! South Riding is a 50 minute drive in traffic which was ever present when I would go. I would never have made it home alive if we had chatted at her house.
She called that night and said that Birdly did not have behavioral issues he needed a neurological exam. She was kind, loving, and extremely concerned that I not view her time with him as a neurological exam! She told me to go back to my pediatrician and get a referral to see a Neuro Psych.
I was heart broken that my truth spoken 2 years before that my son had autism was coming true. I went to Google and read way to much. It misinformed me and put me onto a bunch of lies and snake oil salesman.
I took Bird to see Dr. Jack (not his name but a nice man with no idea what autism is) and Bird brought his favorite Thomas the Train engine with him. He happily lay of that dirty floor rolling his train back and forth watching the wheels role for an hour. For the 25 minutes Dr. Jack was in the office Bird never looked up and I was told that yes he was showing so classic signs of autism but would need a Neuro Consult and a referral.
Dr. Jack was a coward! His referral said Bird made eye contact and showed little sign of autism! (this would be the opposite of the the Neurologist said but I am getting ahead of myself). His cowardice cost Bird a chance to go to John’s Hopkins for an evaluation and get some real idea of what was wrong with him! We stopped seeing Dr. Jack after I wrote him a poison pen letter.
To digress: Bird’s shots were always separated in a non-thermasoil solution because a girl friend of mine from my mom’s of multiples Wendy who had triplets had a son recently diagnosised with autism and she was determined that we know what happened to her child. Her son likely did get triggered by the shots and my son was born with autism. This in my opinion is why we have a spectrum…there is not one cause for autism but many.
More later as I am off to get my hair done for a family wedding this weekend…yipeeeeeeee